Ernie: Oscar!
Bernie: Did you kill him?
Oscar: Yeah, Yeah. Exactly how it looked; that's how it is.
Don Lino: I tell you what's what, and what?
Sykes: What?
Don Lino: What what?
Sykes: What what nothin'. You said what first.
Don Lino: I didn't say what first.
Sykes: You said "and then what?' and I said "what?'
Don Lino: No, I said what, what?
[pause]
Sykes: ...You said what first.
Angie: What did you expect? You just take credit for killing a shark and then everything would be fine and dandy?
Oscar: Well... yeah.
Angie: Sometimes, I wanna take your big, dumb, dummy head, and just... nyhhhh!
[makes pounding motions]
[Oscar has just prised his way out of a shark's jaw and is striking a manly pose for the crowds]
Oscar: Are you not entertained?
[the crowd cheers]
Oscar: You Can't Handle The Truth!
[the crowd cheers]
Oscar: You had me at hello!
[the crowd cheers]
Lola: The only thing I like more than money is... revenge.
Lenny: Mom says it's not okay to hit!
Frankie: Mom ain't here.
Angie: You don't have to live at the top of the reef to be somebody.
Oscar: He trips underwater. Now who in the halibut trips underwater? And by the way, on what?
Oscar: Ernie! Bernie! My jellyfish brothers! Booyakah!
Lola: Deep down, I'm really superficial.
Shrimp: [trying to sob his way out of being eaten] Its true, its true! And the other thing is, my sister had a baby and I took it over after she passed away and the baby lost all its legs and arms and now its just a stump but I take care of it with my wife and... and its growing and its fairly happy... and its difficult because I'm working a second shift at the factory to put food on the table but all the love that I see in that little guy's face it makes it worth it in the end. True story.
Don Lino: [on phone with Oscar] Shut up? Shut up? You don't tell *me* shut up, I tell *you* shut up!
[hears phone dialing]
Don Lino: What?
Luca: Hi, how you doing? I'll have a large pie, everything on it...
Don Lino: Luca!
Luca: Oh... Uh, hi, Boss! What're you doing working at a pizza joint?
Don Lino: [shouts] Get off the phone!
Luca: But I'm hungry.
[hangs up]
Great White #2: [looking at Lenny when they think he's a dolphin] Look, he's got dolphin muscle!
Great White #3: My Uncle Vito got whacked by one of those!
Oscar: You dig, dawg?
Lenny: Dig dawg... , dawg dig, dig dawg, yeah, yo diggy dog!
Ernie: [pretending to be Lola, put mustard and ketchup on a hot dog on a stick so it looks like a face] You're a nobody!
Bernie: [pretending to be Oscar, also put mustard and ketchup on a hot dog on a stick so it looks like a face] No wait! Lola! I'm not a nobody! I'm a weiner!
Lenny: Here I come! Ta-da! I'm Sabastian! The whale washing dolphin!
[makes clicking noises]
Angie: Okay, somebody needs to get me out of the bubble. TODAY.
Don Lino: [record skips] Luca! Please!
Luca: [fixes record, Baby Got Back comes on]
Don Lino, Sykes: [look over at Luca]
Luca: [fixes record again] Heh heh... Funny boss, eh? Big butts?
Shrimp: Say 'ello to my little friends!
Oscar: Yippee-ki-yay...
Ernie: Sykes' Whale Wash... and the price... oh!
Sykes: It's "Sykes Whale Wash; And the price..."Oh My Gosh!'"
Ernie: Hello, Sykes' Whale Wash; And the price...
[Sees Don Lino chasing Oscar]
Ernie: OH MY GOSH!
Bernie: Hey, you got it right.
Oscar: I'm not really a shark slayer...
Crazy Joe: [remorseful] And I'm not a financial advisor!
Sykes: My brother, my player, the shark-slayer!
Ernie: Syke's Whale Wash. You get a whale of a wash and the price... eh... is really really low.
Crazy Joe: [stops closing credits] Hey! Hey, you see this guy here?
[taps crew member name]
Crazy Joe: He hardly worked on the film at all! Always on the phone - yakking, yakking, yakking!
Bernie: [Ernie just lost at the "Sharkslayer" videogame] You're not doing it right! I told you!
Ernie: I'm doing it!
Bernie: X, circle, X X, double left square, right trigger down, square, square.
Ernie: Oh, double square! Respect!
Bernie: Respect!
Oscar: Sometimes I just be coughing for nothin'!
Luca: Be there, if you don't wanna see her sleepin' with the fishes. The dead ones. Now nod your head if you understand... Now tell me if you nodded your head.
Katie Current: The shark slayer has done it again, this time luring two sharks into his death trap of hygiene.
Katie Current: You've lost everything you've lied so hard to achieve.
Shortie #1: You so broke your bologna has no first name.
Sykes: Now I have to pay Don Lino protection, so everything you owe me, you owe him.
Oscar: How do you figure that?
Sykes: Simple, the food chain.
[Pulls out chart]
Sykes: On top there's Don Lino, there's me, there's regular fish...
Oscar: And that's me.
Sykes: No. There's plankton, there's single-celled amoebas...
Oscar: And then me.
Sykes: I'm getting there, I'm getting there... There's coral, there's rocks, there's whale poop, and then there's you.
Oscar: That's messed up.
Oscar: You tell Don Lame-o that I don't ever, ever, ever, never ever want to see another shark around this reef again! Ever! Remember this name: Oscar the Sharkslayer!
Crazy Joe: [during closing credits] Man! Did you see what's playing next door? Woo-hoo! Kinky!
Giuseppe: It's a terrible thing. Everyone loved Frankie. May whoever did this die a thousand deaths. May his stinking, maggot-covered corpse rot in the fiery depths of Hell.
Don Lino: Thank you for your kind thoughts, Guiseppe.
Frankie: [dying] Lenny, is that you?
Lenny: I'm here, Frankie.
Frankie: Come closer.
Lenny: What is it, Frankie?
Frankie: I feel so cold.
Lenny: That's just because we're cold-blooded.
[Frankie slaps Lenny]
Lenny: Ow!
Frankie: Moron.
[dies]
Katie Current: Now that you're the Sharkslayer, does this mean you're leaving your job at the whale wash?
Oscar: Please, I hardly work here now.
Angie: You could you lie to me, Oscar? Me?
Oscar: Don't take it personally, Angie. I lied to everybody.
Sykes: Ernie! Bernie! Find the deepest, darkest hole in the ocean, then dig deeper and bury him him in it.
Lenny: Hi, I'm Lenny. Ooh! Little buddy, did I scare you?
Shrimp: You got served!
Lola: Listen, Baby, I know I was a bad girl, but you'd have to be crazy not to take me back.
Crazy Joe: Did someone say crazy?
Oscar: Hi, I'm Oscar - you might think you know me, but you have no idea! Welcome to my crib - the good life, the way the other half lives! Check it out, I got my 60-inch high-def plasma TV with six-speaker surround, CD, DVD, Playstation and an eight-track for one of those days when you're feeling just a little weeka-weeka-weeka OLD SCHOOL, ha ha ha! Coz even a superstar Mac-daddy like me has to have the basic necessities!
Oscar: Sykes! My brother from another mother!
Don Feinberg: [singing] I could fly high as an eagle, if you are the wind beneath my wings...
Don Feinberg: Any requests? How about that Titanic song?
[the sharks moan and groan their dissent]
Oscar: AHHH! Okay, everybody go home to your loved ones - spend the last few hours that you have with each other!
[Frankie starts humming the Jaws tune]
Lenny: That song gives me the creeps!
Frankie: What do ya mean? It's our theme song!
[the Jaws tune starts to play, and the opening credits roll]
Oscar: I'm a nobody - I want some of that!
Angie: [mischievously] Mrs. Sanchez?
Oscar: What? Ewww, no!
Bernie: Ernie, let me ask you a question?
Ernie: Yeah, man?
Bernie: Why is it that we can sting other people, but they have no effect on me or you?
[a tentacle of his brushes and stings Ernie, causing him to fall down screaming and twitching]
Bernie: Ernie! I didn't mean it, Ernie, I didn't mean it, man... Ernie, Ernie, ohh, Ernie...
[Ernie suddenly gets up laughing]
Bernie: Ernie! You made a joke! Good one, man - respect!
Ernie: Respect! Bloatfire!
[they high-five each other]
Angie: You're going way too far, Oscar!
Lenny: Actually, he hasn't gone far enough...
Oscar: Exactly!... what?
[Lenny accidentally eats Oscar]
Oscar: Don't... swallow!
Lenny: Oscar?
Oscar: No, it's Pinocchio - of course it's me! Why did you do that?
Lenny: Oh, I'm sorry...
Oscar: No, "sorry" is when you step on somebody's fin at the theatre! Yeah, that's "sorry"! "Sorry" is when you ask somebody "Hey, when's the baby due?" and it turns out the person's just fat! No, this is as far away from "sorry" as you can possibly get!
Lenny: Oscar, I think I'm gonna puke...
Oscar: Oh, no no no no... Lenny, just open up, nice and slow!
[Angie becomes unbelievably and understandably jealous after seeing Oscar and Lola kiss on television]
Angie: Just tell me, Oscar, because I'm curious - why do you think she's interested, huh? Do you think, for one minute, that she would even be WITH you if you weren't the rich and famous Shark Slayer?
Lenny: [trying to intervene] Awww, you guys, please don't fight...
Angie: Are you that blind?
Oscar: At least she treats me like I'm somebody!
Angie: Yeah, well would she love you if you were nobody?
Oscar: NOBODY loved me when I was nobody!
Angie: I DID!
Don Lino: [hugging his son] Lenny? Is that you? You're alive? I thought I'd lost you... What're you wearing, huh? What is that?
[Lenny heaves a resigned sigh and sheds his disguise. The other sharks gape at him]
Luca: Hey, boss, it's Lenny - he was wearing a disguise so we wouldn't recognise him, but he's not wearing a disguise, so we DO recognise him!
Lenny: Hi, Pop...
Don Lino: Are you kidding me? Are you kidding me? Are you out of your MIND? Do you have any idea how this looks?
Giuseppe: This is the best sit-down I've ever been to!
Don Lino: What're you doing with this guy? He took out your own flesh and blood, Frankie!
Lenny: But Pop, just listen...
Don Lino: But nothing, you never take sides against the family, ever!
Oscar: Don, Lino, sir, listen, it's not his fault - this is between you and me!
Don Lino: What did I ever do to YOU? You took Frankie away, and you turned Lenny into a dolphin! I'm going to get you!
[He goes for Oscar]
Don Lino: Ya took Frankie away from me, and ya turned Lenny into a dolphin. I'm gonna get you!
Lenny: [quietly] Echo. Echo.
[little louder]
Lenny: Now batting in for the Southside Sharks, Number 15...
[Oscar hits Lenny]
Lenny: Ow, it's not okay to hit.
Ernie: Ernie:
[On phone]
Ernie: Whale Wash rhymes with Gosh
Sykes: [On the phone, while watching Oscar slay Lenny on TV] Turn on the TV! Turn on the TV!
Sykes: [Still on phone and Oscar has been eaten by Lenny] Turn off the TV! Turn off your TV!
Sykes: [Still on phone and Oscar escapes Lenny's mouth] What are you doing turning off your TV? Turn on your TV!

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　　ernie:nbsp;oscar!bernie:nbsp;didnbsp;younbsp;killnbsp;him?oscar:nbsp;yeah,nbsp;yeah.nbsp;exactlynbsp;hownbsp;itnbsp;looked;nbsp;that‘snbsp;hownbsp;itnbsp;is.donnbsp;lino:nbsp;inbsp;tellnbsp;younbsp;what‘snbsp;what,nbsp;andnbsp;what?sykes:nbsp;what?donnbsp;lino:nbsp;whatnbsp;what?sykes:nbsp;whatnbsp;whatnbsp;nothin‘.nbsp;younbsp;saidnbsp;whatnbsp;first.donnbsp;lino:nbsp;inbsp;didn‘tnbsp;saynbsp;whatnbsp;first.sykes:nbsp;younbsp;saidnbsp;“andnbsp;thennbsp;what?‘nbsp;andnbsp;inbsp;saidnbsp;“what?‘donnbsp;lino:nbsp;no,nbsp;inbsp;saidnbsp;what,nbsp;what?[pause]sykes:nbsp;...younbsp;saidnbsp;whatnbsp;first.angie:nbsp;whatnbsp;didnbsp;younbsp;expect?nbsp;younbsp;justnbsp;takenbsp;creditnbsp;fornbsp;killingnbsp;anbsp;sharknbsp;andnbsp;thennbsp;everythingnbsp;wouldnbsp;benbsp;finenbsp;andnbsp;dandy?oscar:nbsp;well...nbsp;yeah.angie:nbsp;sometimes,nbsp;inbsp;wannanbsp;takenbsp;yournbsp;big,nbsp;dumb,nbsp;dummynbsp;head,nbsp;andnbsp;just...nbsp;nyhhhh![makesnbsp;poundingnbsp;motions][oscarnbsp;hasnbsp;justnbsp;prisednbsp;hisnbsp;waynbsp;outnbsp;ofnbsp;anbsp;shark‘snbsp;jawnbsp;andnbsp;isnbsp;strikingnbsp;anbsp;manlynbsp;posenbsp;fornbsp;thenbsp;crowds]oscar:nbsp;arenbsp;younbsp;notnbsp;entertained?[thenbsp;crowdnbsp;cheers]oscar:nbsp;younbsp;can‘tnbsp;handlenbsp;thenbsp;truth![thenbsp;crowdnbsp;cheers]oscar:nbsp;younbsp;hadnbsp;menbsp;atnbsp;hello![thenbsp;crowdnbsp;cheers]lola:nbsp;thenbsp;onlynbsp;thingnbsp;inbsp;likenbsp;morenbsp;thannbsp;moneynbsp;is...nbsp;revenge.lenny:nbsp;momnbsp;saysnbsp;it‘snbsp;notnbsp;okaynbsp;tonbsp;hit!frankie:nbsp;momnbsp;ain‘tnbsp;here.angie:nbsp;younbsp;don‘tnbsp;havenbsp;tonbsp;livenbsp;atnbsp;thenbsp;topnbsp;ofnbsp;thenbsp;reefnbsp;tonbsp;benbsp;somebody.oscar:nbsp;henbsp;tripsnbsp;underwater.nbsp;nownbsp;whonbsp;innbsp;thenbsp;halibutnbsp;tripsnbsp;underwater?nbsp;andnbsp;bynbsp;thenbsp;way,nbsp;onnbsp;what?oscar:nbsp;ernie!nbsp;bernie!nbsp;mynbsp;jellyfishnbsp;brothers!nbsp;booyakah!lola:nbsp;deepnbsp;down,nbsp;i‘mnbsp;reallynbsp;superficial.shrimp:nbsp;[tryingnbsp;tonbsp;sobnbsp;hisnbsp;waynbsp;outnbsp;ofnbsp;beingnbsp;eaten]nbsp;itsnbsp;true,nbsp;itsnbsp;true!nbsp;andnbsp;thenbsp;othernbsp;thingnbsp;is,nbsp;mynbsp;sisternbsp;hadnbsp;anbsp;babynbsp;andnbsp;inbsp;tooknbsp;itnbsp;overnbsp;afternbsp;shenbsp;passednbsp;awaynbsp;andnbsp;thenbsp;babynbsp;lostnbsp;allnbsp;itsnbsp;legsnbsp;andnbsp;armsnbsp;andnbsp;nownbsp;itsnbsp;justnbsp;anbsp;stumpnbsp;butnbsp;inbsp;takenbsp;carenbsp;ofnbsp;itnbsp;withnbsp;mynbsp;wifenbsp;and...nbsp;andnbsp;itsnbsp;growingnbsp;andnbsp;itsnbsp;fairlynbsp;happy...nbsp;andnbsp;itsnbsp;difficultnbsp;becausenbsp;i‘mnbsp;workingnbsp;anbsp;secondnbsp;shiftnbsp;atnbsp;thenbsp;factorynbsp;tonbsp;putnbsp;foodnbsp;onnbsp;thenbsp;tablenbsp;butnbsp;allnbsp;thenbsp;lovenbsp;thatnbsp;inbsp;seenbsp;innbsp;thatnbsp;littlenbsp;guy‘snbsp;facenbsp;itnbsp;makesnbsp;itnbsp;worthnbsp;itnbsp;innbsp;thenbsp;end.nbsp;truenbsp;story.donnbsp;lino:nbsp;[onnbsp;phonenbsp;withnbsp;oscar]nbsp;shutnbsp;up?nbsp;shutnbsp;up?nbsp;y